My Very Own Knight’s Tale
Is chivalry dead? I certainly hope not – at least for today. For I am sat astride a war horse named Oscar, lance in hand and shield on arm, about to make my jousting debut against a potentially deadly lady opponent named Zana. And if she forgets her manners, even for a moment, I am liable to end up in an unsightly and very humiliating heap.
Zana certainly knows what she is doing. With her husband Karl, who is acting as my squire, she runs the rather remarkable Centre of Horseback Combat. Set in glorious Georgian stables in Hertfordshire, the school offers lessons in a variety of exotic riding skills, from jousting to horseback archery. Imagine Harry Potter with lances, not broomsticks.
Of course, I’m not a ‘complete’ amateur. I can just about ride and, courtesy of Zana and Karl, have had at least two hours’ instruction in the delicate arts of handling a lance (without hitting your mount’s head every time you raise and lower it), defending with a shield, and sending a fully armoured opponent crashing to earth in a gentlemanly, or ladylike, fashion.
Sir Galahad, however, I am not. And yet here I am, with Oscar, about to engage in an historic battle of skill, strength – and steely nerve.
I turn to face my opponent, and Karl hands me my lance and shield. He mutters a last few words of encouragement, and I lower my visor. The world shrinks to a slither of sunlight, my heartbeat hammering in my ears. I can feel Oscar becoming eager, skittish beneath me.
Zana gives her salute, I return it, and then push Oscar into a canter. He stretches out, his pace quickening and I lower my lance, searching out my target. Within moments, Zana will be upon me. I wonder how much it is going to hurt.
Until this point, this had been one of the most enjoyable afternoons I can remember. It had started two hours earlier, with Karl strapping on my armour and talking me through his rather unusual line of work.
When they’re not teaching (anyone can take a lesson), he tells me, he and Zana stage jousts at castles, fairs and special events. They also stand in as knights in films and television dramas, including recent Hollywood blockbusters Snow White And The Huntsman and Jack The Giant Slayer. (Doctor Who fans will be interested to hear that Karl even doubles as a Cyberman.)
The greaves (shin guards), cuirass (breastplate) and pauldrons (shoulder protectors) he is buckling on to me, however, aren’t metal, but a very authentic-looking plastic. In fact, this is exactly the type of armour they wear in the films – some of the pieces have even appeared in them. The advantage, of course, is that plastic is far less cumbersome than metal plate when you’re a new student trying to master the art of knightly combat. Particularly on a balmy summer’s day.
Oscar, too, is a real pro: responsive when he needs to be, but forgiving of rank amateurs wobbling around on his back in suits of plastic armour. He is also as big as an oak, and in his armoured headpiece and heraldic regalia, makes for a very convincing war horse.
Once astride him in a field in front of the magnificent main house, which dates back to 1773, the lesson begins with the lance. It is a light, training weapon, but is still nearly 10ft long with a lead counterbalance in the handle.
‘The most important thing is to avoid hitting Oscar every time you raise or lower it,’ says Karl. ‘He won’t thank you for that.’ And I don’t blame him.
The correct technique, he explains, is to lower the lance horizontally across your body, before gently swinging it round to the front. ‘And make sure you ride a good, straight line,’ he adds. ‘You don’t want to be fishing for your target.’
We start with some practice targets and, at first, lining up the lance – without upsetting Oscar – seems an impossible task. Gradually, however, Karl’s instructions fall into place. I start trotting, then cantering, at the targets. I feel ever-so slightly like a trainee St George.
Until Zana appears. Fully armoured and fully armed, she trots into the field looking every inch the champion. She turns her horse and rears it in front of me. I think she’s trying to impress me – and it’s worked.
And so, five minutes later, I am barrelling towards her, lance lowered, wondering why I ever left my desk. Thirty metres, 25, 20, 10… Will I ever see Bedford Street again?
Well, the answer is: of course. Zana is both far too professional – and chivalrous – to unhorse a novice. Instead, we move our lances gently away and pass each other perfectly harmlessly.
It is, however, an exhilarating experience. Three hours ago, I arrived as an urban desk jockey. Now, thanks to Zana and Karl, I feel like a knight in shining armour.
Well, almost.
The Centre of Horseback Combat in Hemel Hempstead offers a range of tuition in horseback archery, jousting and acrobatic riding. Contact them direct for more information: 01442- 462715, www.horsebackcombat.co.uk
The Centre for Horseback Combat also offers lessons in horseback archery, a sport that is growing fast around the world and which, according to Zana, is particularly popular with older women.
Introduced by the warriors of the Asian Steppe and used in combat since 500BC, the skill is a fabulous challenge for both complete amateurs and experienced riders.
Lessons start slowly, but students will eventually learn how to hit a target while riding without reins and at a full gallop. And from there, you can go on to compete at the very highest level around the world.
Zana certainly knows what she is doing. With her husband Karl, who is acting as my squire, she runs the rather remarkable Centre of Horseback Combat. Set in glorious Georgian stables in Hertfordshire, the school offers lessons in a variety of exotic riding skills, from jousting to horseback archery. Imagine Harry Potter with lances, not broomsticks.
Of course, I’m not a ‘complete’ amateur. I can just about ride and, courtesy of Zana and Karl, have had at least two hours’ instruction in the delicate arts of handling a lance (without hitting your mount’s head every time you raise and lower it), defending with a shield, and sending a fully armoured opponent crashing to earth in a gentlemanly, or ladylike, fashion.
Sir Galahad, however, I am not. And yet here I am, with Oscar, about to engage in an historic battle of skill, strength – and steely nerve.
I turn to face my opponent, and Karl hands me my lance and shield. He mutters a last few words of encouragement, and I lower my visor. The world shrinks to a slither of sunlight, my heartbeat hammering in my ears. I can feel Oscar becoming eager, skittish beneath me.
Zana gives her salute, I return it, and then push Oscar into a canter. He stretches out, his pace quickening and I lower my lance, searching out my target. Within moments, Zana will be upon me. I wonder how much it is going to hurt.
Until this point, this had been one of the most enjoyable afternoons I can remember. It had started two hours earlier, with Karl strapping on my armour and talking me through his rather unusual line of work.
When they’re not teaching (anyone can take a lesson), he tells me, he and Zana stage jousts at castles, fairs and special events. They also stand in as knights in films and television dramas, including recent Hollywood blockbusters Snow White And The Huntsman and Jack The Giant Slayer. (Doctor Who fans will be interested to hear that Karl even doubles as a Cyberman.)
The greaves (shin guards), cuirass (breastplate) and pauldrons (shoulder protectors) he is buckling on to me, however, aren’t metal, but a very authentic-looking plastic. In fact, this is exactly the type of armour they wear in the films – some of the pieces have even appeared in them. The advantage, of course, is that plastic is far less cumbersome than metal plate when you’re a new student trying to master the art of knightly combat. Particularly on a balmy summer’s day.
Oscar, too, is a real pro: responsive when he needs to be, but forgiving of rank amateurs wobbling around on his back in suits of plastic armour. He is also as big as an oak, and in his armoured headpiece and heraldic regalia, makes for a very convincing war horse.
Once astride him in a field in front of the magnificent main house, which dates back to 1773, the lesson begins with the lance. It is a light, training weapon, but is still nearly 10ft long with a lead counterbalance in the handle.
‘The most important thing is to avoid hitting Oscar every time you raise or lower it,’ says Karl. ‘He won’t thank you for that.’ And I don’t blame him.
The correct technique, he explains, is to lower the lance horizontally across your body, before gently swinging it round to the front. ‘And make sure you ride a good, straight line,’ he adds. ‘You don’t want to be fishing for your target.’
We start with some practice targets and, at first, lining up the lance – without upsetting Oscar – seems an impossible task. Gradually, however, Karl’s instructions fall into place. I start trotting, then cantering, at the targets. I feel ever-so slightly like a trainee St George.
Until Zana appears. Fully armoured and fully armed, she trots into the field looking every inch the champion. She turns her horse and rears it in front of me. I think she’s trying to impress me – and it’s worked.
And so, five minutes later, I am barrelling towards her, lance lowered, wondering why I ever left my desk. Thirty metres, 25, 20, 10… Will I ever see Bedford Street again?
Well, the answer is: of course. Zana is both far too professional – and chivalrous – to unhorse a novice. Instead, we move our lances gently away and pass each other perfectly harmlessly.
It is, however, an exhilarating experience. Three hours ago, I arrived as an urban desk jockey. Now, thanks to Zana and Karl, I feel like a knight in shining armour.
Well, almost.
The Centre of Horseback Combat in Hemel Hempstead offers a range of tuition in horseback archery, jousting and acrobatic riding. Contact them direct for more information: 01442- 462715, www.horsebackcombat.co.uk
NOW HOW ABOUT HORSEBACK ARCHERY?
The Centre for Horseback Combat also offers lessons in horseback archery, a sport that is growing fast around the world and which, according to Zana, is particularly popular with older women.Introduced by the warriors of the Asian Steppe and used in combat since 500BC, the skill is a fabulous challenge for both complete amateurs and experienced riders.
Lessons start slowly, but students will eventually learn how to hit a target while riding without reins and at a full gallop. And from there, you can go on to compete at the very highest level around the world.